I need to know!

[sphinxface]

Okay guys! (sorry for the rant, but please read and give me your opinions >o )
It's been 3 months now! :roll:



I think I'm scared to do something wrong with handling him, I've been trying to read everything I can about handling my little Beezle-butt and I am still unsure.

You all probably know I'm so new to birds, though I sit on the computer and read TONS of stuff on them, it's still intimidating to actually know I have a little bird brain in the other room that might be traumatized by some small mistake I make...

I've read some stuff, people say let the bird come to me, but he doesn't want to come to me. When I get him away from his cage (Which I'm still unsure about, right now I use his swing to carry him away cause he wont step on a dowl) He will step on my finger but I can tell he's uneasy about the whole situation.





What I think I gotta do is keep taking him away from the cage and making him step up, maybe let him rest on my shoulder and nibble on my hair... I just don't want him to hate me cause I almost feel he already does! I feed him tons of millet out of my fingers and tell him what a pretty/good birdy he is. I guess I just got to do this more I just don't want him to be scared to be outside of his cage, he almost looks half paralyzed (he wont eat millet as eagerly and wont play as much with his toys) when I have him on my hand, but he doesn't fight with me either.

I guess I just need some reassurance that what I'm doing is the right thing for my little fluffers... I want him to be confident outside of his cage, I want him to at least feel comfortable on my hands, I don't want him to turn into a biter, I want him to be healthy and happy!



Of course if none of this stuff happens I will still love him anyway(He's TOO cute not to!!), but if he doesn't want to spend time with me, perhaps it would be best if I got him a friend?

[Janie]

Have you tried taking him/her into a small dimly lit bathroom? That is what I did with both Shy and Big Boi, individually and also together. I sat in the floor and talked to them and that is where I taught each one to "step-up." They were both "tame" when I got them (hand fed by their breeder) but not at all interested in me since I was a total stranger to them. Had I not been determined to become part of their flock, they would have been perfectly happy if they never saw me again other than to feed them. I'm sure they didn't "like" me, why would they? They didn't know me and had no idea what I great life I had planned for them. :D I did the bathroom routine for about 3 or 4 weeks and it made a huge difference in their trust and behavior towards me. They eventually started climbing all over me. :)

I will add this: After a couple of months I would hold my bird even if he didn't come to me. All three of mine love to be held closely and petted but if I'd never taken that step, I doubt seriously they would have known they would like that. I know that it takes some birds a long time to feel comfortable and secure in a new home but 3 months is a long time and I think Beezie is ready for the next step. Just my 2 cents and there is no doubt that "my" method could fail but it worked very well with my birds.

[Flapjack]

I agree with Janie :)

Ok- Here's what happened with Jack...
I brought him home at 2 wks to handfeed. I held him several times a day, and I was sure he would be the most loving, sweet little thing ever.
Around 4 months old, he started biting me. I was shocked, confused and heartbroken. He was my first bird since a young child, and even though I had handfed him, I guess I was still treating him like he was SO fragile, afraid I'd break a feather or something if I held him wrong.
My BIL came over and scooped him up, and though Jack didn't know Greg well, and kept trying to bite him, Greg just held him and talked to him. He let Jack know that no matter how hard he bit, or protested, Greg wasn't going to hurt him, and petting actually felt good.
I began to do the same thing. When Jack would try to bite me, I would put his beak in the crook of my finger and just kiss him on the head. I would stroke his back, his wings, and rub his belly.
Pretty soon, he really came to love this cuddling time with me, and when I put my hand in his cage he jumps in and buries his little head in the crook of my finger. This is how I get him out of the cage and we kiss and cuddle like this for a few minutes before he starts flying around. I can roll him all over in my hands and he even lies on his back there. This is also how he goes back in.
I say, you've had your baby this long, just go ahead and do it!
He might protest at first, but a few minutes a day for a week or so might just do wonders for your relationship!

[LauraO]

I totally understand a lot of your concerns. I remember getting my first lovie and being terrified he would hurt me or I would hurt him. However, it's sounds like you are doing all the rights things, and both you and Beezle should get more comfortable as time goes on.

Beezle feels comfortable with his cage so it's natural he should feel a little uneasy away from it. He should get more and more comfortable as he's away from it more and gets more comfortable spending time with you on your shoulder or on another play area. I checked out your videos and Beezle seems to be doing great, and seems to like you. You are able to interact with him and he's not afraid of your hands. Whether or not to pet him and hold him is up to you. I've found most birds are not snuggly in the way us humans expect them to be.

Keep up the good work:D

[Sweetpeaches]

this is a repeat from a previous thread but i think it fits here too:

i've been through all kinds of stages with peaches. when she first came home at 5 mos. old she learned to step up right away and whenever i put my finger in her cage she would step up so i could take her out. but at that time there was no way i could touch her with my fingers or hold her.

then came the phase after she realized her cage was "her" territory that i could no longer stick my hand in without getting a nip...no more step ups from in there. so i just left her door open and let her come out on her own...which she did..then from the door she'd step up.

now 9 mos. later i can put my hand back in her cage and she jumps right on it. i can hold her and pet her...but guess what? she will NOT step up for me anymore! when i put my finger in front of her or a dowel she throws her wings out sticks her tail in the air and jumps right over it.

now i have to scoop her up in my hands and carry her back to her cage! the little stinker!

[michael]

I think I'm scared to do something wrong with handling him, I've been trying to read everything I can about handling my little Beezle-butt and I am still unsure.

You all probably know I'm so new to birds, though I sit on the computer and read TONS of stuff on them, it's still intimidating to actually know I have a little bird brain in the other room that might be traumatized by some small mistake I make... When I get him away from his cage (Which I'm still unsure about, right now I use his swing to carry him away cause he wont step on a dowl) He will step on my finger but I can tell he's uneasy about the whole situation.... I just don't want him to hate me cause I almost feel he already does! I guess I just need some reassurance that what I'm doing is the right thing for my little fluffers... I want him to be confident outside of his cage, I want him to at least feel comfortable on my hands, I don't want him to turn into a biter, I want him to be healthy and happy!
Of course if none of this stuff happens I will still love him anyway(He's TOO cute not to!!), but if he doesn't want to spend time with me, perhaps it would be best if I got him a friend?

You know, its good to take in as much as you can if your new to companion birds, but I also think its possible you can take in too much at one time. A good example is, we can find 20 ways to tame our lovebird but only one of them may work. At the same time they might all work with the exception of one. So, based on the usual unpredictable outcome do we really need to work on 20 different methods to taming our lovebirds? Most of the time I think we only need to use maybe "two" good ones and we can move along just fine. The same kind of holds true for health care with the exception there is more to it. Really though, the best we can do is get to know our birds basic habits, what to watch out for in regards to signs and/or symptoms, and spare ourselves the training and knowledge necessary to become veterinarians in a couple weeks. Or at least until we've got more time.

I think what a lot of poeple should realize is birds "do not hate" but only react as a matter of survival. Their defensive behavior will best be characterized by each ones individual personality followed by a taming/training experience to be enjoyed by us for the time it takes to arrive upon any given level. Its exciting to think our little feather brains are suddenly in our hand or on our head after weeks of just trying to get them to come out of their cage. When they finally tip that head down for a few scritches, or perhaps accept some millet and exchange a few bird calls, thats when we really find out what its all about.

Regarding being scared to do anything wrong with him. Mistakes or traumatizing can only occur through reactions their afraid of like vocal/physical aggression and/or emotional instability. Or maybe giving him toys or food your not entirely sure of. The only other would be certain environmental changes or perhaps noise like prolonged loud music or a dozen unruly teenagers who's parents let them smoke around birds :x. Vacuum cleaners on the other hand (giant birds with elephant trunk like beaks) we really don't have much choice, but they do help to make sure their chirps are working properly.

I think your moving along just fine seeing how he has stepped up onto to your finger. As long as he's not biting why not stick to that? I have to ask too, do you know if Beezle is a he or a she? If you find he's a she this can add a few bumps in the road, most of which could be smoothed out with a little extra love and understanding. Getting another friend for Beezle? Now that will take a bit of extra thought and planning. You would be best to confirm his true gender, think of the worst possible outcome if you do introduce another lovebird, and then take it from there. Vet cost and quarantine "included"........:)

[Jally]

I agree with Michael. Too much info may not be a good thing. Trust in your instincts too. Birds are forgiving and are pretty resilient, within reason of course. Sounds to me like he trusts you but they can sense fear and uneasiness and will react to that.

One little mistake in training isn't going to harm him. To be openly honest, my dh flicked Peanut on his beak after he bit him...it hasn't broken his trust towards me or my dh and he is OK. Dh got a tongue lashing from me though let me tell ya!!! And he has never done it again!! Peanut does not get punished in any way except for a brief timeout when he is being overly grumpy.

Sit down in your fav comfy chair, watch a little tv with Beezle and relax. Let him explore your shirt...wear something with buttons (buttons that are very well fastened!! Nothing loose!!), or something like a hoodie. Peanut loves hoodies, pockets, openings, buttons... I also drape a baby blanket around my shoulders and he loves to explore that. He likes to go in between the folds and chirp or sometimes he will snuggle right in and take a nap.

Have fun with your little guy.

[michael]

Too much info may not be a good thing. Trust in your instincts too. Birds are forgiving and are pretty resilient, within reason of course. Sounds to me like he trusts you but they can sense fear and uneasiness and will react to that.

One little mistake in training isn't going to harm him. To be openly honest, my dh flicked Peanut on his beak after he bit him...it hasn't broken his trust towards me or my dh and he is OK. Dh got a tongue lashing from me though let me tell ya!!! And he has never done it again!! Peanut does not get punished in any way except for a brief timeout when he is being overly grumpy.

Sit down in your fav comfy chair, watch a little tv with Beezle and relax. Let him explore your shirt...wear something with buttons (buttons that are very well fastened!! Nothing loose!!), or something like a hoodie. Peanut loves hoodies, pockets, openings, buttons... I also drape a baby blanket around my shoulders and he loves to explore that. He likes to go in between the folds and chirp or sometimes he will snuggle right in and take a nap.

Have fun with your little guy.

Now thats some good advice!..................:) :) :)