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LoveBugs
07-29-2005, 12:35 PM
Thanks to everyone on this board that has not only given me great advice, but asked questions so I can learn, my nesty, biting hen and me has made HUGE progress today and I couldn't be happier!

I have had her for 5 months, and today, for the first time when we locked eyes, I realized I truly love her, and I actually felt a mutual feeling eminating from her!!!

The most important things I learned from this site is:
1. patience is a REAL virtual when coming to lovies; it must be on THEIR term and NOT yours!
2. respect your birdie's cage. this is HER territory. Hence, never put your hands in there and grab her or do anything to scare her in her safe haven.
3. always talk to your birdie as if she understands you...cause she does!
4. not all bites/nips are BAD! that's a form of communication! YOU must learn to interpret them.
5. learn to read her body language!

Why the sudden excitement?
I have been reading more and more and been more diligent in HER body language and in tune with HER mood....

So this morning I was able to "read" her for the first time:

Today she did her little baby chirps, her feathers were fluff up in that, "I'm in need of some loving" fluff of a soft ball of beautiful feather and with those dreamy eyes.

So I approach her cage...She hopped to her boing in the back of her cage.... And dialated her eyes... I spoke to her as if she was really a 2 year old child, and she hopped to the highest perch where I can put my fingers through the cage, at first she opened her beak to nip me, but I rubbed her beak which she seems to enjoy. Then I softly pet her head....She allowed me to do this for about 15 minutes and her eyes began to slowly close... She lightly nipped me again...So when I stopped petting her, She actually fell asleep, with her head resting on her shoulder, and one footsie tucked up. When I walked away, she didn't even open her eyes at my movement!

There was just LOVE in the air!

I'm so HAPPY and I owe it all to this site!!!

So THANK YOU!

And to other lovie owners who think their birdie is impossible... Don't give up! My birdie is a Petsmart buy who was most definitely from a birdie mill!!!

butterfly1061
07-29-2005, 12:46 PM
Makes you fall in love with them even more when things like this happen, huh? :happy: I felt the same way you do about all the information I've learned from this site. I bought my Molly about a year ago and WOW :omg: how my life has changed. In fact I've bought two more lovies since :lol I couldn't have done it without all the people here. Kudos to everyone!! :D

Elle
07-29-2005, 12:52 PM
I'm glad you are making progress with your lovebird. I can tell you by experience, don't despear. My second lovebird came from a petstore. I was told that she was handfed. I think hand fed to them meant a person changed the food in the cage and it's not an automatic dipenser.
That lovebird could take a nasty chunk out of your fingers hands and neck. But with hard work, she came around. It was amazing. she went from completely wild to velcro baby. I've had 10 wonderful years with her and I still miss her.
My current lovebird, Blu, also came from a petstore. She was wild when she joined our familly in February. We take it slow and it works for us. She is a gentle little girl and very shy. She loves our company and is so happy to see us when we get up. She likes scritches but is affraid to ask fro them. As time goes by, my relationship with her will become stronger as well.
You talked about connecting with your baby. As time passes, you will see that it gets even better.
Even if your lovebird came from a birdie mill, she is still a little creature with a wonderful personality that is just asking for a lot of patience in order to give you her trust.

Keep those bandaids close by and keep your hopes high. I know you two will do even better, look how far you've come :)

linda040899
07-29-2005, 01:02 PM
I'm always glad when I read messages like these! Sometimes I feel like we're talking just to be talking and lovie owners are thinking..."Sure, right! When h**l freezes over!" Birds are living, feeling creatures and must be recogized for what they are!

As a human, how would you react if something/someone intruded on YOUR home? I guarantee you would do something to protect it and yourself and you wouldn't be too long about it! Guess what, each time our hands enter our birds' cages, we are invading their homes and we have to respect whatever reaction we get.

Love, kindness and patience are the keys to opening the doors of a trust relationship. Is the result worth the time/effort? Personally, I think so.... :)

Thanks to both of you for sharing.

bellarains
07-29-2005, 01:04 PM
Hey,

I am so happy to hear of your progress. That word "patience" is used allot here, and sometimes easier to say than to do, but it always pays off eventually. It sounds like you and your little henny penny are on the way to a good relationship :)

I am glad that you posted your progress, as it does give so much encouragement to those who are where you have been. I know we always tell people not to give up, take it slow, take the time to learn what your lovie is trying to tell you, and respect when they tell you it's "theirs", but it's always great to have it reaffirmed that it does indeed work.

I look forward to hearing more as you progress.

Janie
07-29-2005, 02:27 PM
WOOHOO! That is great news! Even though my boy was never a bitter, he sure was very shy in the beginning and had not learned to trust me (us). I kept reading here, over and over, that patience is the key to changing behavior and gaining trust and it is the truth. I've had Oliver for almost 2 years and he is nothing like the bird he was when we adopted him. I observed positive changes for months after he came into our homes....and into our hearts! Things just got better and better all the time!

Keep up the GREAT work! :)

BTW, my boy is also a PetSmart (or similar) birdy who was definitely not hand raised in any way. No human contact until he was purchased by his first owner, about 9 years ago. You just never know what a lot of patience and good lovin' can do! :D