Velcro birdie???

[bookworm0550]

how do I know if I have a velcro bird? I ask cuz since Joey's an only bird, he's always on me. I feel so bad leaving him while i go to work. And then as soon as i get home, he's on me and all day during the weekends (well, maybe not all day cuz he goes back to his cage to eat). Is this just normal behavior since I am his only companion (except when my boyfriend comes over and then those hang out). Long story short, when does just hanging out with me become "clingy?" Bless his birdie heart, he's the sweetest, laid back, little bird, and i love it when he wants to hang out w/ mom, but it can get a bit annoying sometimes. He'd rather hang out on me than on his play pen or with his toys :)

[Z28Taxman]

Here's an easy test for velcro birdies. Put bird on shoulder. Sit on couch. Put millet on couch. If the bird stays on your shoulder or gets as close to the millet as he can without leaving you... You have a velcro bird.

Of course that's also a good test for the sucker for birds. If you can't stand the pathetic chirps and looks and give the millet to the bird, you're a sucker. :rotfl Don't ask em how I know. :whistle:



Come to think of it, that sounds more like the lovie slave test.

[bookworm0550]

ok, taxman, i tried the whole millet on the couch thing. He saw, he looked, he thought about it, made his way down my arm, kept looking, kept stretching his head towards it, got on my forearm, and turned his back on it. I'm surprised he didn't go for it cuz it's his favorite treat. *sigh* well, that's one test to see if he's a velcro baby. He didn't care for the millet, but he sure didn't deny it when i gave it to him anyway.

[Z28Taxman]

Yep. It's official, you've got a velcro birdy.


And like me, you're officially a slave. :omg:

[bookworm0550]

oh yes, I am Joey's slave. I fall for every sad look and chirp. I go for every dramatic cage climbing to be let out. Oh well, I did wish for a velcro baby when I saw him in the ad and here he is >o

[michael]

For the most part the term "velcro birdy" means exactly just that, any parrot who clings to your person for an extended period of time. While this may be the goal of many poeple who keep companion birds, for some parrots and humans this behavior may be worth a change in their daily structure. Quite often from the start, many will work on taming their birds for the sole purpose of being able to handle or cuddle them without realizing the only thing their teaching their bird is to respond by doing just that.

I often cringe a bit when I hear about new owners who can't wait to begin taming their parrot. Taming really should include teaching all companion birds that their very existence doesn't always revolve around humans. Reason for this,.....they may become so dependent upon constant human interaction, that whenever poeple leave or don't live up to their expectations they may become very insecure.

The fact that Joey has become somewhat of a velcro birdy, as you've stated that generally he only wants to hang out with you, he needs to be taught other activities are just as important as clinging to you. A good start may be in not letting him out just because your home or have been gone most the day, but rather only letting him out for short periods of time. As long as those combined periods total at least 4 hours or more a day this should be fine. I would also keep trying to encourage other activities both in and out of his cage to help offset some of his dependency on you. While doing this can take more patience and time than it did to reach the point your at now, a willingness to change the present state your in may give Joey the benefits he needs for the future.

[bookworm0550]

yes michael, I have realized how unhealthy this can be. I truly wonder what he does in his cage all day while I'm at work cuz when I come home, he's always in his happy hut. It's so scary cuz right now he's in his cage and he is climblng all over the place going nuts wanting me to open up the door for him. I just want to open up the cage door, but I know he needs to learn that being in his cage is not a bad thing. Seriously he is going NUTS in his cage, flopping around and stuff. and he's chirping super loud too for me. :(

I also talked to his breeder about this and she suggested that I ignore when he calls for me (cuz I'm a sucker) cuz really he is the one who has me trained. I have toys in his cage for him, but i don't think he cares too much for them.

I'm not sure what else to do. If anyone has any ideas, let me know. I can tell he's insecure and whatnot when he's not out w/ me.

[Christian]

First let me say, I feel your pain. I've generally always got a bird on my shoulder or on top of my head ;) So I'll try to help....How old is Joey? I've noticed that as Boogie has gotten older he has become more independent. When you leave the room while he is in his cage does he continue to cry for you and go crazy? When Boogs wants out he cries and shakes his swing back and forth while attached to the top of the cage hanging upside down :) But, if I'm not in the living room (which is where his cage is located) then he will usually cease this activity and play with his toys. Which brings up another question, do you have enough toys and entertainment for Joey in his cage? Boogie often argues with his toys for hours during the day.
Also, you might want to establish a routine with Joey, I wouldn't be precise on the times but maybe every morning before work have him out for 10-15 minutes while you change out his food and maybe try to eat yourself (maybe even share :) and then when you get home spend an hour with him. Then give him some alone time for about an hour or two and then get him out again before bedtime for another 1-2 hours.
This works for me, especially since I'm in grad school and work. My schedule is always changing, so Boogs has had to learn how to be flexible with his mommy time.
Also, if you want to spend time with him, but do not want him on you 24/7 maybe introduce him to a new toy or a play pen. Boogie has a play pen that I sit on the coffee table in front of me...this keeps him occupied and allows me a few minutes to be birdie free. I've noticed that if he's out and I am in the same room (generally no more than 2ft away) he is pretty content.
Hope this helps!

[momo]

Christian.. oh you should never say having your bird on you is a pain!!.. ever... try having a bird who wants to do nothing but eat your fingers and ears.. and eyes.. and nose.. and neck...

I wish I was allowed to give him scritches, but he's so highly independent..

[bookworm0550]

Christian, yes I have toys for him, but i don't think they appeal to him. I don't think I found the right toys for him yet. I have an idea of what he likes now that he's here and not beforehand when I was getting things ready for him. He just discovered the swing in there a few days ago along with the bell attached to it and he was really into that, but I don't think it's as appealing anymore. i'm in the process of making him a foraging basket and he's more into the hemp I used to wrap around the handle. I mean, he's really into that. He'll play on it as long as he's near me. Who knows how long he'll be into that.

Joey becomes an acrobat when he sees me. He'll get loud if I leave the room or if I'm ignoring his antics. Usually when I leave for work and he's climbing all over his cage, I'll walk out my door and listen to him. He's usually quiet after I'm gone.

Oh and he's about 3-4 months old. Still a baby and still bears very little darkness on his beak, but it's there.

I'm gonna try that tonight, spending time w/ him, putting him back in his cage after that so I can get things done and then taking him out again before bedtime.

[Christian]

I think that once he gets a little older he'll become more independent. Just make sure that you spend a good quality amount of time with him in between breaks. They are like 2 year olds always wanting your undivided attention. Watch out when he gets about 5 months old though..Boogs became very nippy at that age.
Good Luck!

[Christian]

Momo- I wasn't implying that having my bird on me is a pain, but rather that I sympathize with bookworm in that when you have a velcro birdie you feel guilty for leaving him at all. I am sorry that you are not having quite the relationship that you want with your bird right now, but having a velcro birdie isn't a healthy relationship for the bird either.

[michael]

I agree it sounds like Joey is really going through a learning stage quite normal for most lovebirds. The advantage here is that he's willing to explore at an early age where some lovebirds, depending on gender or personality, may remain very reserved.

I think Christian also hit upon a key word here and thats "independence". While not much else beats having a parrot cling and cuddle us, where should we draw the line as far as this being the best for them? My guess is if you have the time, having a 100% velcro bird may be fine, whereas if you don't (likely the majority), then you need to help your bird become more independent.

Eventually, we all learn our parrots needs through the time we spend with them. Depending on whats a reasonable amount of interaction time for each parrot in comparison to our own schedules will help create a structure or routine best suited for their care. A good for instance here might be my own lovebird whereas for awhile he would just as soon cling to me than do much of anything else. While I certainly have enough time for him, I still have a multitude of other important business and/or personal matters to take care of. That said, I also know it wouldn't be fair or healthy for him if the only time we spent together was for the sole purpose of scritches and beak rubs followed by a good cage cleaning.

I think the best thing I've done for my lovebird so far is to inspire upon him his own independence. Whenever he does something on his own I incessantly praise him then try to encourage him even more. For instance, I love to hide new toys from him or even his old ones just to grab his curiosity. To me, nothing is more entertaining than having my Goofy bird want whatever it is I have. Foraging tools work great too as then you can leave them inside their cage while you are out or doing chores. At the same time though, I like to build upon his feelings of security by letting him know I'm in charge. I do this several times a day by using the "step up" command.

Quite honestly, I think your doing just fine with Joey by providing him plenty of time and activities. You do have to expect though, that until they learn where their position is as flockmate, their only way to complain is by making as much noise as possible. Unfortunately, if you continually give in to that type behavior you will only reinforce the idea that this (and biting) works great for them......:clap

[bookworm0550]

i think we all just want our birds to be in the middle between being dependent and independent. And yes, having a velcro bird can be tough. I just feel so guilty leaving him every morning and not having him understand that momma needs to work so she can buy him toys and keep him spoiled.

he's still very young, so i'm sure he'll learn quickly. I've only had him for about 3 weeks!!!! thanks everyone!!!