View Full Version : I am heartbroken
newloviemom
01-12-2009, 11:52 PM
I have no idea what could have possibly happened...earlier today, I was holding Skittles. He was all snuggled up on me under my hair, chirping and beak grinding...very content. He ate this morning like normal, had actually started to do some playing, and seemed 100% normal in every way. this afternoon at about 3:30, I was talking to my daughter on the phone, and we decided to go do a little shopping and go out to eat, as I work all the rest of this week and will not see her or my granddaughter. I put Skittles in his cage, and he protested like he always does. I proceeded to get ready to go, and left the house by 4:15. I got home at 10 pm put my bags down, said hello to my shih tzu and went to Skittles' cage to say hello, and he was laying on the bottom of the cage and it was obvious there was no life at all.
I have NO idea what could have happened. Everything was fine all day with him, and now he is just gone. All of his things are here and it is so empty here without him. I mean, this little soul chose me, and immediately proceeded to wrap me around his little claw toe. I have no idea what to do or think. He ate fine this morning, and he had been munching big bird food off and on throughout the day. I only used filtered water for him, as that is also the only water I will give my dog and my grandbabies.
I just don't understand.
Flapjack
01-13-2009, 12:00 AM
Oh no! I'm so sorry! :very_sad:
I really don't know what to say, except I'm sure he knew you loved him very much...
:very_sad: (((Hugs)))
bookworm0550
01-13-2009, 12:01 AM
ohmigod cindy, i am so so so so very sorry about this. i know how in love you were with him. please, if you need to talk to anyone, feel free to write me. i am so very sorry. i can't believe this happened. if i could give you a big bear hug in person right now, i would. i'm so sorry.
newloviemom
01-13-2009, 12:10 AM
Thank you Flapjack and Bookworm...I am just heartbroken. I hope while I had him he knew how very much he was loved. I miss him so much already...his soft little feathers on his head where he loved his scritches. He was just so feisty today too. he should be sitting here on my shoulder right now. I was so looking forward to a good long relationship with that beautiful little bird. To make matters worse, I have to work the next three days, and nobody at work is going to really understand...afterall he was "just a bird". Nobody understands the relationship one has with a bird unless they are bird people themselves.
I am wondering if he had something from the breeder's aviary and it just hit him or if I would have known long before now if he would have had something from the aviary.
Cindy
bookworm0550
01-13-2009, 12:23 AM
well, you know what, we don't think he was "just a bird," but i know what you mean. i don't know what could have been wrong w/ skittles. do you think he might have been sick? i am still so shocked he's gone. cindy, i'm positive he knew you loved him very much and i know he loved you as well.
bbslovie
01-13-2009, 12:35 AM
Hi, I'm so sorry to hear about Skittles! Skittles knew how much you loved him so have comfort in that. Fly high Skittles! Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Barb
newloviemom
01-13-2009, 12:50 AM
well, you know what, we don't think he was "just a bird," but i know what you mean. i don't know what could have been wrong w/ skittles. do you think he might have been sick? i am still so shocked he's gone. cindy, i'm positive he knew you loved him very much and i know he loved you as well.
I just don't know...he just did not act sick at all!! he was very active all day...in fact I had written earlier how he had started biting today, then realized, it was my ring he was going after, but would bite me to get me to quick typing and moving my hand I think so that he could try to get to my ring. I wonder if it was the soap that I wash my hands with...an antibacterial soap...softsoap...but if that was the case, wouldn't all of our babies die from us washing our hands?
Bookworm...I sent you a pm...
Cindy
bookworm0550
01-13-2009, 12:58 AM
i doubt it's softsoap cuz i use that too and my fids are fine, but i don't use the anitbacteria one. i know, i saw your posts earlier about him and how well he was doing that's why i'm just like, "what?! how?" i'm sure when linda or someone w/ more lovebird experience comes on, they'll be able to figure something out.
maya_exquisite
01-13-2009, 01:45 AM
Oh man... I'm so sorry!! :(
Maybe you could contact the breeder and ask if any of the other birds are sick or have died recently? Do you plan to get a necropsy?
Bubblelady
01-13-2009, 01:47 AM
"Just a bird" does not apply
To Fids of any size
For they are family member,
Enriching human lives.
I am so sorry! I wish I could hug you right now. While the people at work may not understand, know that everyone here understands completely.
(Though it's hard to think about this right now, a necropsy would be a good idea. If it was something that Skittles came to you with, the breeder should be warned. And if you want to get another lovie--how could you not, now that you know what special beings they are--you need to know if there is something in your home that needs to be corrected. And maybe it just was a terrible accident that could not have been prevented. I lost a budgie once because she broke her neck doing acrobatics in her cage).
Fly high, little Skittles! Your life was short but you brought much joy into the lives you touched with your beautiful self!
HaleBoppPeachyluv
01-13-2009, 02:01 AM
BIG HUGS.
Losing a lovie is like losing a part of your heart, no matter how long or short we have them.
I had a two year gap in heartbeats when my Hale-Bopp flew to the rainbow bridge and bringing home my next fid, Makali`i. When I lost Maka to a horrible accident (always check your ceiling fans) after just 6 months, I thought I was the worst fidma in the world. There was no one outside family that would understand how much losing him hurt. I wound up calling in sick to grieve.
Now that I have my Sunrise-to-Sunset (aka the Sunnybird), I know that Maka would have loved her too. I still miss him, as I miss all my lovies.
Fly high, skittles!
linda040899
01-13-2009, 03:18 AM
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((Cindy)))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))
I'm so very sorry to hear about Skittles! Please have a necropsy done on the remains. There's only one thing I know that kills this quickly and it's Polyomavirus. It's possible that he had a genetic defect (heart problem) but the age is just about right for Polyoma. If I'm right, it would have come from the breeder's facility.
I am terribly sorry for your loss.. *big hugs*.. your work colleagues may just think he's jsut a bird.. but we all know here that he was more than just a bird..he was your friend and all of our friend too.. we all know how much fids mean to us.
Jally
01-13-2009, 05:53 AM
:( I'm so sorry about Skittles. No one understands the way we do. We are all here for you.
Big hugs
michael
01-13-2009, 07:25 AM
Oh my.....:(......How awful to hear of Skittles sudden passing. I'm so sorry. Prayers for Skittles and his family.
Please, with whatever means possible, do try to find the cause of his passing, as more often than not through the anquish and pain poeple like yourself who love birds will find there are others in need of a good loving home. Also too, for the safety of your remaining pets, complete a thorough check of their total environment. While some parrots do suffer certain congenital defects that can cause sudden death, its worth a check to make sure nothing else has been overlooked. I.e...houseplants (sand or potting soil), teflon coated pans or other products, carbon monoxide (from furnace), Etc. Again, you and Skittles have my deepest sympathy. Please take care.
I'm really sorry for your loss. Sometimes, it happens that they leave us with no warning. They seemed fine one minute and the next they are gone. It might not be anything you did. And I doubt it is. Sometimes, there is just something wrong with their health and they go when the time has come. Take for example Alex and Dr Pepperberg. Alex had recently came back from his anual birdie well check and few days later he passed away. He was deemedin good health at his check up.
Your little bird has accomplished a great mission in his life time. He showed you the joys of being owned by a bird...
wilkiecoco
01-13-2009, 09:55 AM
I am so very sorry for your loss. How tragic that it was so sudden. I can tell from the way you spoke of Skittles that he was truly loved, and he definitely knew that. There is no such thing a "only a bird" - when a lovie enters your life, you are forever smitten. They wraps themselves around your heart.
Fly High Sweet Skittles - your momma is going to miss you.
Oh god Cindy I am so sorry. I don't even have words to express how sorry I am. The same thing happened to me with my little Lutino Daisy (except we were away and friends were taking care of her), one minute she was fine and then she was dead in my friend's hands...I cried for three days straight...
This is just *such* a shock. I wish I could reach out through cyberland and give you a great big hug.
I agree with the others that getting a necropsy is the best course of action. It's hard to believe how fragile these little creatures can be. I am so so so sorry. I wish I had more words...
{{{CINDY}}}
Pips mom
01-13-2009, 11:16 AM
I hate hearing stories like this where there was no signs of anything wrong, but unfortunately I have heard stories like this before. Not only is the shock of it so sad, but I know it sure makes me a little uneasy that this is possible. Very very sorry for your loss.....I think lovies are one bird that is famous for being able to really steal your heart....they are just so darn cute and smart little stinkers. I can't believe this happened to you and I am so very sorry! :very_sad:
carrier
01-13-2009, 11:30 AM
(((((Cindy)))))
It is such a shock to read this about Skittles.
I am so very sorry this happened.
Fly high, sweet Skittles!
Chickobee
01-13-2009, 11:50 AM
Oh Cindy, I'm so terribly sorry to hear about Skittles. :very_sad: What a shock that must have been for you. How awful to have something like this happen with no explanation or warning. I'm so sorry for your loss. :heartbreak: (((((((((Cindy))))))))
Hopefully you will be able to get some answers.
After a small fluff of feathers gets into our hearts it is hard to think of living without their cheerful presence.
BarbieH
01-13-2009, 12:56 PM
((((Cindy))))
p3rr4n
01-13-2009, 02:44 PM
:grouphug:
Cindy,
I am so sorry to hear about Skittles. I wish there was something I could do to make it all better.
Please remember we're all here for you and we do understand your grief. I know you were a great mom and loved Skittles with all your heart. Please take care of yourself.
Janie
01-13-2009, 07:54 PM
Oh Cindy, I am so sorry! (((HUGS)))
butterfly1061
01-13-2009, 08:52 PM
(((((Cindy)))))
I am so very sorry to hear about Skittles. Lots of thoughts & prayers coming your way. Fly High Skittles!
newloviemom
01-13-2009, 09:34 PM
I got home from work a while ago, and the first thing to greet me was Skittles' empty cage. I still just cannot understand what happened.
It is so hard to see the empty cage and all of his toys hanging there...of course, he didn't really play with them yet, but they were there waiting for him when he was ready. I don't know what to do with all of his stuff. It is hard to see it all sitting there, and yet, I can't bear to part with it yet either.
He was only here for just shy of 4 weeks, but he left such an imprint on my heart...I mean he had my heart from the minute I picked him up and he scrambled right up my arm to my shoulder as if to say "this is where I belong...you are my parront and you ARE taking me home!"
I am questioning everything now...could it have come from toys bought at petco? Could there be something in the air there that spread to the toys? I also last weekend had bought him a playpen thing with ladders and perches and a swing for on "our" desk. It was a penn-plax one...also bought at petco.
Most of the toys I bought him were off the internet...I think I actually only bought a couple from petco.
Could it have been the Kaytee Exact that I fed him for that short time? He really seemed to turn around quickly after I switched him to Zupreem.
I know i should get a necropsy done, but I have spent alot of money on him with toys, cage, etc. and then also just bought my daughter a laptop computer as she is just starting school, and her birthday is coming up. So I don't have the extra money upfront right now. I wonder if I can save him in the freezer for a couple of weeks until I get my next paycheck. Or if I take in a dried stool sample can they tell anything from that?
And if idecide to get another bird...how long should I wait and can I disinfect Skittles' cage? Should I throw out all of his toys, perches, etc? He also had a rope boing swing...should I get rid of everything? or can I soak them in bleach? I suppose probably not with the rope stuff--I guess I should just throw that stuff out. I don't know if I can bring another baby home even...
I would constantly be worried that the same thing would happen...I mean...if I knew what happened, it would be different...I would do what I could to prevent it from happening again...but not knowing...I would worry every time I left the house that I would come home to a baby that had died again...and I can't go through this again. It is really hard as I'm sure many of you all know.
Sorry I am rambling...I'm just writing down all of the thoughts running through my head right now.
Thank you all for the well wishes and the understanding, and the e-hugs.
I just really miss my chirpy little guy.
Hugs to all of you--
Cindy
Kiwi*
01-13-2009, 09:54 PM
ohhh nooo! im sooo0ooo sorry for your lost of cute little Skittles!! R.I.P Skittles fly high with my lovie petrie!
thebubbleking
01-13-2009, 10:02 PM
Fly high skittles!
We are all here for you, and if anyones says" it's just a bird" punch them in the groin and say "it's just a punch!"
cp.lovebird
01-13-2009, 10:20 PM
I am so sorry for your loss of Skittles. What a terrible shock for you. :very_sad: Lovies are such precious birdies and it is hearbreaking to lose one. There is no such thing as "Just a bird!"
I am not sure if freezing will keep the body in good condition for a necropsy perhaps you can check with your vet first?
Fly high sweet Skittles!
Have you read the Rainbow Bridge poem yet? It is posted in the "In loving memory of" as a sticky. I cried so much when I first read it after losing a lovie.
Take care. We are here for you. ((((Cindy))))
Bubblelady
01-14-2009, 12:03 AM
Ramble all you want, Cindy. We are the people who understand your ramblings, honest. And please don't take this as a criticism...but do think long and hard about not getting a necropsy done. A necropsy would be the best way to answer those nagging questions. Whether you can clean & resuse Skittles cage & toys, if there is something in your environment that needs fixing, if you should get your next bird from a different breeder--only a necropsy can tell you for sure. I don't know if a necropsy can be postponed but a phone call to the vet can answer that. And if you explain the situation you can probably work something out. I know my vet has let me split a bill into payments, with me leaving post-dated checks for each payment. If you don't find out what took your Skittles, you may be afraid to get another lovie & miss all the joy & love that comes packed inside these amazing little birds! I truly believe that the joy and love and laughter lovies bring into our lives is worth to pain we feel when we lose them. To quote from one of my favorite authors:
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain.
... joy and sorrow are inseparable. . . together they come and when one sits alone with you . . . remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.
Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931)
Be with your sorrow now, but know that joy is awaiting another turn. And may that joy be wrapped in feathers!
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