Tarquin (again!)

[Loupigs]

Hi all!

Anyone familiar with my previous posts will know that my 4 month old lovie has put me through the mill a bit with his/her (again, previous post!) erratic behaviour towards me.

HOWEVER... I am pleased to announce that Tarquin has decided he loves Mummy again! Yay! He is all over me like a little birdie terrorist. I'm so pleased with the way he has settled in and become a family member :-) I look forward to getting home to the little yellow bullet every night and on Saturdays I get the whole day with just me and Tark in the flat for some quality playtime. My favourite thing is every morning he likes to sit with me whilst I dry and straighten my hair... It's a little hairy sometimes as he does like to sit on my head and straighteners aren't the ideal thing so I have to shoo him off every 2 mins but he's settled into this little routine in the mornings of chatting away to me and following me around whilst I get ready for work. Boyfriend has already left by that time so it's really nice to have birdie with me. I always make sure I'm the first to his cage, ask him if he wants a seed to which he replies with kissy noises and pokes his little beak out, then he croaks 'thankyou' when I give him the seed :-)

But two things -

1. He will not let me touch him with my hands. It's really odd, he will climb all over me, nestle in my hair, hang off my ears, take treats. But if I try to do a step-up, or tickle him, anything, he just goes nuts and sinks in that sharp little beak. My way around this is to step up onto the handle of a wooden spoon and that's working fine for now, but I'd like it to be easier for in the future. What have I done to make him so terrified/angry about my hands?

2. For all his loveliness, I can be sat innocently reading whilst Tark scuttles around doing his birdie thing, chewing my hair etc... When all of a sudden I'll get nasty bite to the ear, lip or eye. There's no warning signs, I don't move or change my behaviour. Just one minute he's fine, the next...Nip. He's not playing, or tasting me or testing his beak, I can tell when he's doing that... I just get a nasty hard bite and then he flies off all cross and flustered.

All advice appreciated, sorry for the essay. I do tend to rave on a bit....

Lou.xxx

[linda040899]

Tarquin sure has come a long way since you first introduced him to us!!! :)

In regards to the hands thing, accept it for now. There are many birds that are afraid of/don't like human hands that close to them and your best course of action is to go with the flow. You have a very loving lovie and that's the most important aspect of the relationship. Tarquin WANTS to be with you! Forgo the hands thing, for now. It may be subject to change in the future, but that decision is in his court.

It usually applies more to larger parrots and it's easier to control with larger birds, but shoulders are dominant places. Reason being, it's hard to see what's going on when a bird is on your shoulder so it's hard to dodge potential nips/bites because you don't see them coming. If you have long hair, use it to cover your ears. A turtle neck top or something that protects your neck will help from the chin down. Facial bites are harder. All you can do is have things to entertain Tarquin which will keep him busy and hope the toy is entertaining enough so that he forgets about facial nipping. If/when it happens, immediately let him know, verbally, that it's painful for you and it's a no-no. Banning a lovebird from a shoulder is one course of action but it's a hard one to enforce!

[Loupigs]

Thankyou Linda, your advice is always brilliant.

Thinking about it, the shoulder/dominance thing is obvious, I should have spotted that. I find it difficult to entertain Tark if he's there because I can't use my hands, but I will try chatting to him and feeding him seeds more often. It's very rare that I'm not paying him 100% attention to be fair, so I suppose the odd occasion when mummy wants to quietly read a book/watch TV probably makes him seek attention the same way a child would? He has plenty of toys and free flight around the flat, but maybe I'll invest in a proper play area for him, so he can identify it as 'his place' when Mum&Dad don't want to play? Maybe it's just boredom now that he's made himself firmly at home, and a new plaything will stimulate him a bit? It's amazing how much he's changed in the 2 months we had him. Can anyone recommend a good playstand? I've seen several on eBay but I do wonder if they're resilient enough, he is Destructobird now!

I won't fuss about the hands too much, I just wondered if they is something obvious that I was missing. I've tried different colour nail varnish/jewellery, different hand soap etc and even none at all so I don't think it's any of those factors. He's fine with Boyfriend's hands. My only concern is should he escape/get himself into trouble it will make it ten times more traumatic for him because I will HAVE to handle him somehow. He got out of a window once before (not my fault!!!) and luckily he flew down & stepped up to Boyfriend, but if had been just me then I don't think that would have happened. Although that was the phase when Tark hated me so maybe he'd be better now. Let's just hope we never get to that situation.

[Z28Taxman]

There are only 2 times Ditto will bite. 1) try and take his food or 2) he thinks you're not paying enough attention to him.

Fortunately he's calmed down quite a bit and doesn't bit (me at least) for attention. Probably because I didn't give in and just ignored him when he'd get nippy. Yes it hurt like he** but fortunately he never bites hard enough to draw blood.

As for the food... Well just don't touch it when he's hungry! :whistle: Those bites may involve blood.

Ok there is a third way to get bit. Touch me when he's out of his cage. He'll be your best friend as long as you don't touch me. Then he turns into a pit bull.

[LauraO]

I agree with Linda. It sounds like you have one cute lovin' lovie! The hands thing can be hard to understand. The reality is that some of the most loving, playful, velcro lovebirdies can absolutely hate hands. It doesn't mean you can't have a great relationship and play games and interact together. You just have to get used to it. The hand thing may change, but it very well may not. The best way to manage it is to try and avoid touching your lovie at all, and over time he will come closer and closer to the hands because he knows they won't try and grab him. We have a ton of extra perches/sticks/dowels around for our birds who don't like hands to step up on.

As for the bites. Remember, your lovie is young. He/she doesn't really understand their beak pressure or what biting is. If you don't react much or give him other things to chew on, he/she will likely grow out of it.

:):)

[penelope's person]

Don't have much to add, other than I feel your pain!

I've managed to ban my lovie from my shoulder by placing 'the rules of golf' on my lap whenever she's on me. It HAS to be 'the rules or golf' or it won't work!

haha....but of course, your lovie might be afraid of something other than golf books :P