We almost gave up....(LONG)

[JudiNh]

Well, Jitterbug's good boy behavior didnt last long...less than two weeks, and now he is back to being very mean to the other birds, and difficult to manage. :cry: Ben and I talked about it, and made plans to give him to a woman we know...she has lots of bird experience, but currently only owns finches in a large aviary. She is home all day, works from home, and was willing to take him and keep him as her single birdie companion...he could be free all day from his cage, playing on her desk, hanging out on her shoulder, etc...with no other birds to harrass, and one person to bond to and have all to himself. Tons of one on one time, and attention. Really seemed perfect...much better than him being in his cage 90% of the time here at our house. So, we set it up...she was going to come yesterday to pick Jitterbug up, and of course, all of this was with the understanding that if for any reason it didnt work, for her or for him, Jitterbug would come back here. So, that was the plan. Buuuut....in the last minute, Ben had a meltdown and just couldnt go through with it. He lost it, cried and cried, and said he didnt want Jitterbug to go...."Jitterbug is like a brother to me and I love him...." and all sorts of very sad things like that, with big tears and sobs.....(Ben is my 9 year old son by the way, and Jitterbug has always been considered "his bird"). So, we cancelled the deal. Jitterbug is staying. But I told Ben that we HAVE to make time for him...take him out every day and give him attention, play with him, and not just leave him in his cage all day. And, we have to keep the other birds safe from him, so the attention has to be one on one...no other birdies included during Jitter's out time. Ben agreed, and is making a real effort to spend time with him...taking him in the shower, bringing him to the breakfast table, and letting him hang out on his shoulder whenever he can. Jitterbug is being pretty good about it....not too much nipping and not too much regurgitating and humping of fingers and toes....:roll:...but a little. We are working on it. Poor Ben...he was just such a mess...couldnt part with his buddy, and I couldnt force him to go through with it. So, here we are, back to square one...trying to find a way to make it work. Fingers crossed we are making the right decision....

[linda040899]

Jidi,
Kudos to you and Ben for your dedication and devotion to Jitterbug! There are so many parrots that are rehomed and it's more than refreshing to hear that someone cares enough to put forth the effort to accomodate a bit difficult to handle one. I understand completely, as I'm in a similar position with Georgia, my female Military Macaw. I actually, like you, have a place to rehome her but I've not been able to follow through simply because she's been with me for 21 years and my situation has changed again where I am able to give her more attention that she needs.

I really hope that this works out for all of you, long term.

[JudiNh]

Thanks Linda. It is so hard because even though Jitterbug is, quite frankly, a pain in the neck...LOL...we just look into his little eyes and we melt and we think, but he's part of our family....and then, we cant part with him. So, we have to find a way. We will not consider rehoming him again...it was such a scene for poor Ben, heartwrenching...I will never put him through that again. Jitterbug just has to stay, and we have to find a way to make it work. Ben is trying really hard to include him when he can, and so am I. Where there's a will, there's a way, right?
Wow, 21 years with Georgia! Talk about dedication and commitment! :)
Thanks for sharing...that inspires me even more to do the very best we can for Jitterbug, when he's being good, and when he's not. :lol

[Pips mom]

What a great kid you have there! I know that you have to think about what's best for Jitterbug first, BUT......you just get so attached! I had to leave my Rudy boy with my neighbor a year ago........but we keep in touch and I get to see him sometimes and he looks happy there! plus.....Rudy was never a really tame bird and never really formed that bond to people, or to me, which makes it a little bit easier, plus I didn't have Rudy for a long length of time, a year I think. My birds now I've had for so long......except for Grace, but she's Woody's companion........I think once you've had them for a few years and more, it's much harder to ever think about giving them up. I'd be just like Ben and have a meltdown I think if I ever had to be put in that position, plus my four are in pairs......the tiels stay together and so do Ivy and Pip. I think Pip would be upset if he ever lost Ivy, but Ivy would probably get over it ok with Pip not around......although I'm sure she's miss him, I don't think I'd have to go through the kind of thing when I lost Boss. My tiels now are not a bonded pair and don't mind being apart, but I'd still like to see them together and they WILL stay together for good once they have spent years together, I would never separate, even if they are not a "love match" so for me now, ever having to give up one would mean giving up two and I don't think that I could ever do it.
I'm really happy that you are keeping Jitterbug........time in his cage isn't the end of the world and you got him that huge flight cage just for this reason! He'll adjust ok, and it's not forever.........he'll get over this phase.......just bear with him! I think someday you'll be happy you did! I don't know......something about this year with the hormonal thing.....even Ivy has been really bad this year.......she's ruining her feathers around her neck, not really plucking or anything, not sure, but I come home sometimes to find all the fuzzy stuff under the feathers all over, and I'm quite sure whatever is causing this is hormonal because she's acting VERY hormonal now for some time...........I'm like you, thinking to myself........when's this gonna be over with? I guess it's just one of those things in life where you have to learn to grin and bear it and get through it. If anyone can make it through this tough time, it's you, Ben and Jitterbug! Just have a little faith and try not to let it get you down! He can't be hormonal forever! You know you could always try to figure out a situation for Jitterbug, maybe someone might be willing to bird-sit him for a while sometimes......give him and you all a break. Me and my neighbor used to do something similar with Rudy and her parrotlet Bob........the two loved each other so we'd take turns having them both in our homes. Just an idea. It really worked out very nicely for us and we'd probably still be doing it if I was still with the ex boyfriend and living over there near her. It was nice because I'd get my bird back and get a break sometimes from the cleanup and the time spent giving him out of cage time and getting him back in and all of that.

[JudiNh]

Thanks for the reply Kim. I do hope this phase ends soon...but, it may not be a phase. It may just be who Jitterbug is, and if that is the case, we just have to accept him and deal with it. You are right..its not the end of the world if he has to be in his cage a lot. As long as he gets at least a little bit of out time each day....even just a half hour or so some days, its better than rehoming him. I dont think Ben would have ever gotten over it if we had given him away. So, we will just do the best we can. Jitterbug is well cared for, cage is clean, lots of toys and things to do, good healthy food, showers, birdie companions nearby, and a family that loves him and is trying hard to do what's best for him, so all in all...I'd say he has it pretty good. :) Hope HE sees it that way! LOL

[Pips mom]

I'm sure he does!! You know.......those of us who think of our pets as part of the family and want the very best for them, tend to sometimes feel they aren't doing enough.....not spending enough time. We all get busy at times.......but you have to remember.........all those out there who don't have loving homes. Jitterbug is loved and if he's not happy at times, it's because of the hormones, not because of anything else, and that's just nature, nothing anyone can control. I'm sure that even if this hormonal thing lasts a while, eventually he'll grow older and it will get better. I really don't think that this is Jitterbug being himself.........he spent way too much time before this being himself too and wasn't behaving this way. It's a hormonal phase. Believe me.........Ivy gets it bad too sometimes. She's not mean in any way or anything, but wow, the screaming and other things. It's just a normal birdie thing........you just have to love them and remember that it's not their fault.

[JudiNh]

Thanks Kim. That does make me feel better.

[thebubbleking]

my irn was like that very very jealous! but with time she learned i love them all the same and they all get equal snuggles and flight time, it took a year but she no longer lunges or chases any of the other flock, i honestly think they mellow out as they age i know for sure my lovebird males do! all my males went through the humping everything and being a a**ho*e to everybirdy but as they aged they mellowed out.

[JudiNh]

my irn was like that very very jealous! but with time she learned i love them all the same and they all get equal snuggles and flight time, it took a year but she no longer lunges or chases any of the other flock, i honestly think they mellow out as they age i know for sure my lovebird males do! all my males went through the humping everything and being a a**ho*e to everybirdy but as they aged they mellowed out.

Well, thats really encouraging! Thanks for that...:clap

[thebubbleking]

hormones and stubborness of teenagers with the brains of two year olds and the demanding nature of a high maintinance wife pretty much sums up lovebird males age two and under XD

[JudiNh]

hormones and stubborness of teenagers with the brains of two year olds and the demanding nature of a high maintinance wife pretty much sums up lovebird males age two and under XD


Good grief! Jitterbug will be FOUR years old next month...when does he turn "civil" again? LOL :lol