Update: Ungrateful bird...

[Flapjack]

Ok- so I'm devastated. I do everything for this bird, feed him, clean his cage, buy him toys, and have never even accidentally scared him. This bird will have nothing to do with me and is even flying to the dog now.>: The only time he'll stay with me is if I'm the only one in the room! I'm even thinking about sending him back to my brother-in-law and starting over. I love him and don't want to give up on him, but I don't want a pet that is so much work and not be able to interact with it. He only likes my husband, and he doesn't even want him!! He is almost 6 weeks old. Anyone think this will change????

[mangotiki]

don't give up yet! He is 6 weeks old and very curious. He already knows you the most so he is checking everything else out. I don't think this is a slight on you at all. Are you planning on clipping wings? That sometimes dampens their "independance" and you could also try hanging out with him in a dimly lit room.

Honestly, I would not worry yet at all. I bet you will have a sweet affectionate lovie on your hands in no time at all!

Traci

[KathyMay]

Give him some apple from your hand... give him kisses on his beak...let him
know you're his Mate...give YOURSELF to the bird. Sounds cheezy,but true.

[DebSpace]

Don't give up - 6 weeks is very little time. He's not really ungrateful, he just isn't quite ready and may even sense your apprehension. I know how frustrating it can be when you want so much to have a positive and rewarding experience with your bird, and believe me, in my younger days I would leave the room crying and saying "it hates me." Not so. Do the one-on-one's away from the cage without your hubby around. Take a favorite food treat and try to be consistent and gentle in your approach. Have these little moments every day if possible with just you-n-birdie. Keep it short so neither of you gets overly stressed or tired. Eventually you will see a change. Hang in there!:)

[Tango's_Mom]

I agree, don't give up yet, 6 weeks isn't very old and you haven't had him very long, I like what Kathy May said about giving yourself the bird, alot of one on one time with just the 2 of you, should do the trick, he's a baby and he wants to explore, think of him as a human baby who's just learnt to crawl, it's impossible to keep them in one place, they want to see everything. He's not trying to hurt your feelings and he isn't shunning you, he's just getting to know this new world he's been introduced to. It think that working with him in a small quite, dimly lit room would probably help, I used a bathroom with Tango, just close the toilet seat, make sure he can't get in the cupboard, cover the mirrior, and your all set. I also agree that getting the wings clipped would help, it will make the little guy less independant and make him dependant on you, plus I do think it's important for safety's sake.

One other thing you mentined is that he flies to the DOG, do NOT allow this, my personal opinion is that birds, especially ones as small as lovebirds should never be out of their cages in the same airspace as a dog. It only takes a second for even the smallest, or easy going dog to kill a lovebird. All the bird has to do is spook the dog enough for the dog to snap at it and it's game over. Never forget that dogs are predators, and birds are prey. Dogs (cats and humans) also have bacteria in their mouths that are deadly to birds. I love my dog, and I trust him ALOT, with little kids, cats, little dogs, but he is is NEVER EVER allowed in the room when the bird is out, and he is also not allowed in the room with the cage when I'm not there to supervise. My housmates dog where I live while I'm at school is never allowed in my room at all he shows way to much interest in the cage, and he's a big strong dog, it would only take a second for him to get at the bird.

[LauraO]

I can't imagine giving up on a bird that's just six weeks old. He/she is just a little baby and is exploring it's world with his/her new wings and flight. Often people are misguided in thinking baby lovies are the best way to get a tame and loving bird but that's just not so. Babies go through tons of hormonal changes their first couple of years of life so you will continue to see changes in behavior, etc. Birds are also very opinionated and while your bird will likely grow out of this phase, it's a very real possibility that you will not be his/her favorite person. But that's no reason to give up on the bird or punish him/her. Take time, get to know your lovie, and adjust your expectations about what having a bird means.

I also agree to keep the bird away from the dog. Not a good move. We've heard countless horror stories when cats/dogs mix with bird.

A wing clip is a good idea, but six weeks is too young. I would wait until 8 to 10 weeks to give your lovie time to learn to fly and develop his muscles. I would also do a mini clip when the time comes and only cut 4 to 5 flights on each side.

I've raised enough babies to know they are very hard to handle at this age. They become independent and love to explore the world. They are not trying to hurt or shun anyone, they are just being babies. It's also a good thing if you bird visits other people as this will make him/her a more social and healthy bird. The times I've handfed, I've noticed it also gets difficult to feed them at this age as well. No matter how hungry they are, they take one drink and fly off.

Good Luck and let us know how things go

[wilkiecoco]

my husband, a very wise, calm man, is the one who got through to me when kiwi was doing the same thing with me and my son. Kiwi had been attached only to me for almost 6 months, and then discovered my 16 year old son. he would fly back and forth between the two of us, but since I was used to him wanting to be just with me, I was disheartened. The more frustrated, or upset i got, the less Kiwi wanted to be with me. And can you blame him - I was being a fun-sucker, someone sucks the fun out of an activity. Well, my husband sat me down, made me recognize that Kiwi was picking up in my negative vibes, and would want to be with my son who was funs and games..

My attitude changed from that moment on. I worked at being content at enjoying my moments with Kiwi, and ALSO enjoying watching the time he spent with my son. As a result, Kiwi started coming back and forth, dividing his time between the two of us again. The more calm I remained, the better our relationship became.

One year later, Kiwi is velcro attached to both me and my son, equally, and is happy with all of the members of my family. Yes, I am the one who buys him the toys, feeds him, changes his cage, but he is a better bird for having connection with not only my whole family, but even people who visit our house. He is a happy, well-adjusted lovie.

My point, and I do have one, is that you need to try and relax, and let the relationship evolve. The calmer you are, the more your bird will come to trust you and build a connection with you. I know it is not easy, trust me I know, but with time, and PATIENCE - LOTS OF PATIENCE, it will work itself out. Don't give up - 6 weeks is such a short time for these bundles of attitude and love. :)

[Janie]

I can't imagine giving up on a bird that's just six weeks old. He/she is just a little baby and is exploring it's world with his/her new wings and flight. Often people are misguided in thinking baby lovies are the best way to get a tame and loving bird but that's just not so. Babies go through tons of hormonal changes their first couple of years of life so you will continue to see changes in behavior, etc. Birds are also very opinionated and while your bird will likely grow out of this phase, it's a very real possibility that you will not be his/her favorite person. But that's no reason to give up on the bird or punish him/her. Take time, get to know your lovie, and adjust your expectations about what having a bird means.



My thoughts to a "T".....

I wish you good luck and hope you'll give your little bird the time it needs to become the bird you want.