Will getting another love ruin the one I have?

[Ducky]

So here's the deal. I've had Widgie since he was 8 wks old, and it's been 4 months since he came home with me. He's very bonded to me and my boyfriend, but also loves to socialize with other people when he's in the mood. I think part of this is that even though I'm gone at classes and work a lot during the day, he gets at least 2 hours of out social time every day :) . So far he's turned into an awesome pet, and lets me reach into his cage, pet his neck, and even touch his tail and do all sorts of things a lot of birds won't let people do.

Sometimes though I wonder if I should get another birdie. Part of this is for me, because even though Widgie is pretty obviously bonded he's a love **** and sometimes decides he likes being with everybody else but me. Part of this is because even though he get's lots of time out and is very happy, I feel guilty everytime I have a late lab or meeting or I take a day trip somewhere.

If I got another bird and socialized it and bonded with it during the quarantine and then the break in period, would it still ruin the one I have as a pet? I figure if they are both at least partly bonded with me, they will still want to be around me and cuddle and stuff. BUT if I take a trip or something, I don't have to feel quite so guilty. I do realize that they may not like each other and that I might have to cage them separately, but then they'd still be able to talk while I was away I suppose. And I'd still get another bird! :happy: Is this a good idea? Or am I just looking for disaster?

[Finnysmommie]

I am no expert but I will tell you what my experience with this is. Finny and I were very bonded and then I brought another lovie into the picture. Finny very much bonded with Evie and I felt a bit left out sometimes. Evie never truely bonded with any of us humans until shortly before she got sick. Evie ended up passing away and things went back to how they were with just me and my husband and Finny.

I too felt that it would be good for Finny to have a feathered friend (this is only my opinion) and so after a mourning period we brought another lovie home to live with us. Our new lovie is a male. Reilly (our newest fid) bonded with me right away and when finally introduced to Finny they bonded right away as well. They are now both semi-velcro birdies. What I mean by that is that they do have times they just want to hang out together and play on their toys or stare in the mirror (they are so vain). Other times they just want to hang out on mommy and eat my hair, nibble on my ears or just rest and relax on my arm or shoulders. They both listen pretty well as far as no, up, etc. and seem to want and need their interaction with me.

So I guess to sum it up.... There is really no way to tell for sure. I think it depends on the lovie you have now and the one you might add. I think they will all react differently. There is also no guarantee that they will even bond together.

This is just my experience and to be honest I dont have much. I am sure you can get a better idea from others on this board who have had more experience.

Good luck :)

Cindy

[graushill]

Hello!

I thought I would add my :2cents: :): I think Cindy gave you a good answer, and that is that there are no guarantees what will happen when/if you get a second lovie. My experience has been that if your first lovie is already bonded to you, then chances are that a second lovie, upon seeing your relationship, will also feel inclined to trust you, but then again that depends a lot on the second lovie's personality/degree of socialization. Like Cindy experienced it could be that if Widgie bonds with another lovie, he might not need to be with you in quite the same way he does now. IMO that's not so bad either :). Sure, you may miss your one on one time a bit, but watching two lovies bond has got it's own rewards :).

Bottom line, if you think your lovie is feeling lonely, and you as his mom are the one who knows best, then he probably is, and would appreciate having a friend of his own kind.

Good luck with your decision!

Gloria

PS I also thought I would add, it's not really so good to touch a bird on his tail, because that is actually an invitation for mating in bird language and might confuse your lovie. Widgie is just a baby now, so he's probably not hormonal, but when he gets older having you touch his tail might frustrate him a bit. :)

[mangotiki]

My Mango is with other birds but loves his people time...in fact he insists upon it. My tame birds have never become "untame", although they do become not as demanding for attention from me...which is a good thing as they can hang all day with their bird buddy.

My advice: dna sex your bird. If he is male, then find another definite male. If he is female, then you should definitely get a male but might end up with babies if you are not careful. Hens tend to fight with each other more than male/male or male/female combinations, but there is never a guarantee that two birds will like or dislike each other.

A female will usually prefer a male that is older, not younger, than she is.

Be prepared to house your birds in two separate cages for the rest of their lives as this could be necessary. Still, they might enjoy the company of a neighbor even if they cannot be together.

One lovie is fun, two is better..that is my thought on it.

If you continue to spend lots of time with both birds, together or separately, I don't think there will be a problem.

But like it has been mentioned, there are no guarantees of anything!

Traci

[Ducky]

Thanks eveyone! Right now I'm leaning towards working on getting another bird this summer or fall. I'm still debating the issue. I may DNA sex Widgie, but as he (whatever) is over six months old at this point I'm not sure there is a point in it since it seems they start getting hormonal at that point anyway. Maybe if I get some money that doesn't need to be spent on food (for me and Widgie), toys, etc. .:rolleyes: *dreams*

Unfortunately I won't be able to do anything before I go on a month long trip at the beginning of the summer. Luckily though I have a little brother who will hopefully be willing to take him for a bit.

I was thinking about what you guys said on the velcro birdie, and it made me laugh. Some days I'm the only one for him, and he wants to be on me at all times even if that means just cuddling while I'm on the computer or doing homework. Some days though he decides I'm being boring though and wants everybody else. Should I feel guilty for that being part of the reason I want another lovie? :D

[mangotiki]

Some days though he decides I'm being boring though and wants everybody else. Should I feel guilty for that being part of the reason I want another lovie? :D


Oh I see....you want another bird for yourself, not for Widgie...:rotfl:

Didn't you say you had a boyfriend? Of course I now have to fight Mango for my fiance's attention...and my fiance for Mango's attention...so is the new bird to replace Widgie's affection for you, or your bf's affection for you?:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Perhaps a cockateil? They can be extremely affectionate and I know that mine preferred me to anyone else. The same can't be said for Mango...who fell in love with Rob before I did>o ....:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: A teil and Widgie might not be as interested in each other as two lovebirds would be...

Traci

[Ducky]

No I definitely have my heart set on another lovie. Let's just say it's kinda for me and kinda for Widgie. Course right now he's being all cute and cuddly and makin me feel guilty. :rolleyes:

One more question as long as I'm on the subject. How much louder are two lovies than one? It's not like I don't know or accept that a bird of less than two ounces can be LOUD, it's just more of a worriment since I live with a bunch of other people. Right now Widgie is really good about being quiet in the morning until he hears either me or my bf moving around, then he decides it's UP time! But really I can sleep in usually without too much bother. He's actually the loudest when I'm leaving or coming home and he can hear me out in the hall but not where he can see me. So I guess what I'm asking is if there's another lovie in the cage with him, is he likely to be more or less loud? Some noise is going to happen, that's not my concern, it's just whether there will be more than there is now.

[Janie]

Because my Oliver is an older bird (about 8 at the time) I decided to get two more instead of just one. I did not expect that Oliver would want to share me with another lovie and I figured that with two more, they could have each other and Oliver could still have me but he could still enjoy having other lovies around. As it turns out, they all three like each other very much (all three are males and that was intentional on my part) and all three like me, too. :D Oliver will always be my special bird and he continues to get far more alone time with me but he is very happy with the company of Big Boi and Shy. Oliver is still caged alone at night and Big Boi and Shy share a cage but all three are out together in their bird room when I'm home.

OK, on to the noise question, :lol!! You certainly can expect more noise with two than one but I have not found it to be a problem, even with adding two more. They have their loud moments, usually in the morning and again in the late afternoon but I love to hear them carry on and am always whistling to them and making as many noises as I can to get them going. I think my hubby was a little concerned about the noise level when I got two more but we were just talking about that a few nights ago and agreed that it doesn't bother either of us and that it really isn't a bit too loud. I just don't find lovebirds to be that loud, ever. Sun Conures, yes! :lol