Ayla won't play nice with anyone but me...

[Ayla's Mom]

:confused:
Okay, so here's the newest story in the Ayla & Me Saga:
Ayla refuses to play nice with anyone but me, and bites REALLY HARD anytime anyone tries to play with her if she's on me.
Is this normal? What can I do?
I'm afraid that when I start my new job this week she'll start getting depressed cuz I'll be working 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. Is that TOO long to leave her home alone?
WHAT DO I DO?!?

[Elle]

When she's on you, Ayla apparently doesn't care much for anyone else. My first lovebird was the same way. If I was around, he was nasty to everyone. But when I was in school, he was bestest buddy with everyone else.
Lovebirds are very territorial and can become possesive. Just don't encourage it by putting Ayla in that position. If she bites others while she's on you, get other to pick her up when she not on you or when you're not in the room. Sounds like someone has a little crush on you :)

[Ayla's Mom]

tehee... yeah, I think she does :blush:
The other night she fell asleep in my jacket, and bit my hubby real hard when he tried to pick her up.
The funny thing about her bonding to me is that she bites only me and not my husband. I guess maybe my hubby is a better disciplinarian :)
Okay, I'll try your advice Elle :) I'll ask my mom to play with her when I'm not around :rofl: :rofl:

[Janie]

All three of my birds prefer me and two of them are down right nasty about it. Oliver is a family bird but if he's snuggled under my hair having a nice nap, he will bite anyone who sticks their nasty old finger in to pet him or to try to get him to step up. Otherwise, he likes my hubby and sons a lot. They did not make the effort with Big Boi and Shy from the beginning and therefore, they are not accepted as flock members by them. My hubby has worked hard to turn that around and they will step up for him, especially if I'm gone, and love to play on his head but they are still unfriendly to my sons. IMHO, birds need daily interaction with family members if they are expected to be friendly to them. Some birds will only be a "one person bird" (I know that's common in larger parrots) but many if not most will like all family members if the family works consistently at a good relationship. If they spent half the time I do with my lovies, they'd have 'em eating out of their hands (too)! I also think it matters how they talk to Ayla, too. If you baby talk her, that's how they should start out trying to win her over. Birds really do get used to their care giver and can be leery of anyone who doesn't treat them, even tone of voice, in the same way.

[Elle]

The type of biting she is doing is very normal. She bites you when something is disturbing her because she wants to get your attention and she wants you to do something about it.
Consider them as love bits :lol

[wilkiecoco]

kiwi loves all the members of my family, and works hard at including them in his flock. however, either he flies or hops to them, or i place him on their shoulders. he doesn't like it when someone tries ro remove him from my shoulder or hand.

try this - you put ayla on their shoulder or arm instead of them taking her off of you, and see if that helps. maybe if you show her that they are okay, and they work harder at spending time and bonding with her, things will improve. Good luck!

[Ayla's Mom]

Thanks everyone!
My other IMPORTANT question is regarding leaving her home alone from 10 - 6 everyday. I've read stories about birds that start plucking when they are left home alone. What should I do? Should I get her a mate?

[sdgilley]

Another time I can't handle my Peepo hen is when I've preparing her food. She decides to claim it right NOW!:omg: :lol typical hen!

Good luck. Is your mother in a position of looking in on her some? That would so nice for both of you. Also, if your mother does look in on her, she'll be more friendly to Mom. I keep telling my kids, my birds aren't going to warm up to you because you don't do anything to earn it. Caretaking is a big bridge in building trust.

It's an adjustment, but she'll be okay (and so will you) when you start work. If you can arrange to have your Mom interact with her (slowly at first) while you're away at work, that will make it much easier. There are many folks with a single bird that work out of the home. You can play with Ayla before work and immediately after work. Give her plenty of toys to play with and maybe leave a radio on for some background noise.

Some suggestions about when she bites you. Try to make a mental note about what is going on with you and her when she bites you and look for a pattern. My hen bites me when she's tired (other than when hormones kick in and she goes nuts). I know it's time for her to rest or eat or something back in her cage when she's abnormally nippy. If you can find a pattern, then you can start avoiding situations when she's nippy.

Added: If you decide you want to add another bird, you should wait until the stress of your new job has subsided, in my opinion. New jobs are very stressful. New birds can be very stressful, also. You don't want to double up your stress without thinking it through. Maybe give the job time to see how you and Ayla are doing. I'm not against adding a bird, I just want you to consider all the things that go with that. (Large discussion.) :) :)

[Ayla's Mom]

Thanks soo much Suzanne! You're filled with such great advice:clap:
I'll ask my mom to come in and check on her when she can.
Gosh! I hope this new job thing works out :rolleyes:

[Eliza]

Thanks everyone!
My other IMPORTANT question is regarding leaving her home alone from 10 - 6 everyday. I've read stories about birds that start plucking when they are left home alone. What should I do? Should I get her a mate?


I leave Beetle for roughly 9 hours, 5 days a week for work (sometimes 7 days if I'm doing OT). He's never shown any signs of distress. It's funny: during the weekends he's rather quiet during the hours I'm normally at work. I did bring him home on a Sunday evening and that was our schedule from the very beginning. I don't think that's an unreasonable amount of time to leave a bird alone. In a perfect world, we'd all be able to telecommute so we could spend more time with pets and family (and heck, our own selves, for that matter) but working outside of the home is a reality for many pet owners.

Ayla *might* be a little annoyed with you for "leaving" her but I don't think that a new job is necessarily going to cause her to pick or pluck her feathers. You can do things to make your time away more enjoyable to Ayla: set your TV to a timer so it comes on for a few hours. Play children's TV or animal shows. Or play quiet music (rainforest CDs seem to be a hit with animals). Replace an existing toy with a "new" toy every morning before you leave for work (a preening toy or a noise toy would probably be appreciated in this circumstance). If you have a friend, neighbor or family member available, have them stop by to visit with her a couple days a week (they don't necessarily have to handle her; maybe give her a treat and to chat w/ her). Or maybe your DH can use the hour or 2 before you return home (assuming he gets home before you do) to play and bond w/ Ayla.

I have to agree w/ what sdgilley suggested: if you are thinking of adding another bird to your home, wait until you have settled into your new routine with work AND home. That will make any transition easier for everyone involved.

Best wishes,

-e-

[Z28Taxman]

Ditto is friendly with everyone who comes into my house as long as they follow 2 simple rules.

1. Don't touch daddy or you're gonna be bloody.
2. Don't try and get me to step off daddy or you'll get the same result as number one.

:rofl: :rofl:

He will fly to visitors (even fist time visitors) and check them out and say hi. Everything is fine as long as rule 1 and 2 are followed.

As for leaving them alone during the day, I leave for work around 6:30am and get home around 5pm. Ditto naps quite a bit during the day ( I know he does because even when I'm home he'll nap a good bit of that time if I don't bother him).

[DebSpace]

My birds nap off and on, too. I have a small CD player in the room that has an alarm feature. I set it to come on in the middle of the day on relaxing music and they seem to really like that.

[mangotiki]

Check out the first sticky in the Behavior and Taming forum. Maybe your birdy thinks you are the bomb!!! It totally explains Magno's relationship with Rob..or rather Rob's hairy chest underneath the shirt tent that better not move or whatever is closest outside the shirt tent is gonna get it, even if it is only Rob's neck, and if you stick your finger near me when I'm on my Rob or down my, I mean Rob's shirt, even if that finger belongs to Rob, I'm gonna tear it off and rip it to bits and if that right nipple keeps looking at me under hear I'm gonna rip that off too...it's MY Rob and MY shirt and MY hairy chest. And don't even think about moving me cause I'm the mean green Mango machine....

[Ayla's Mom]

:rofl: at Traci's comment! just one question: does Mango pull out Rob's chest hair? Ayla has a habit of picking at birth marks, hair, scabs, and basically anything else on our skins that looks like she can hook her beak into... OUCH!

[LauraO]

Thanks everyone!
My other IMPORTANT question is regarding leaving her home alone from 10 - 6 everyday. I've read stories about birds that start plucking when they are left home alone. What should I do? Should I get her a mate?

As long as Ayla has a roomy cage with a lot of toys and still gets daily out of the cage time, she should be fine. It would be good if others could take this opportunity to get to know her and spend time with her while your away. Another good tip, is to include Ayla in your morning activities. If there is a perch or something she can perch on as you get ready for work, she can hang out with you in the morning. My birdies love hanging out before I leave for work. In fact, my first lovie Zimber is well over six years old, and he still loves brushing teeth. I exaggerate the movements so he gets a ride when he's on my head or shoulders8o .

[mangotiki]

:rofl: at Traci's comment! just one question: does Mango pull out Rob's chest hair? Ayla has a habit of picking at birth marks, hair, scabs, and basically anything else on our skins that looks like she can hook her beak into... OUCH!

No, he leaves those things alone. Aside from "rearranging" the hair to make things more homey. But I have found that all my young birds do have to remove, destroy, shred or otherwise mutilate all my little imperfections.:omg: ouch!!!

and earrings too.

[Ayla's Mom]

Laura:
I'll try your advice as per the getting ready in the morning together :)

Traci:
Maybe its an age-related habit that the lovies pick at us. The other day, Ayla picked off a HUGE scab off my shin from where I slipped on the deck on the frigging ice from the Northern Virginia blizzards that we got last week. IT HURT SO BAD!!!

I was also just wondering about bird baths and showers: Ayla does not bathe (she's a dirty hippie :D ). So should I take her into the shower with me and let her hang around on the shower curtain rod?

[sdgilley]

I was also just wondering about bird baths and showers: Ayla does not bathe (she's a dirty hippie ). So should I take her into the shower with me and let her hang around on the shower curtain rod?

Some members have birds that play in their showers, but I'd have two concerns. First, my shower isn't the cleanest place and would be a source of bacteria to my lovie. Another would be my own caution of wet bird/wet me. I'd be afraid on an accident just because of the combo, but that is my feeling.

Peepo bathes in my hands in the kitchen sink. She won't bathe anywhere else. :roll: Peter used to bathe in a casserole dish, until Luka came around. Now they take turns bathing in their water dish. Luka acted like the casserole dish meant bird casserole, so Peter followed suit. It was a shame, because it was an event with a ladder and audience.

If you do take your bird in the shower, you can get suction cup perches, so the bird has a place to perch.